The Good Life

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Wacko Jacko

Cut and pasted:

A young black man on the Motown label scores numerous commercial hits and along with his brothers, becomes a smashing success. As a young adult, this fellow becomes a solo artist and sells even more records. He breaks records by releasing one of the biggest selling albums of all time.

Somewhere along the line he begins to morph into a white guy using plastic surgery. He eventually has so much surgery that his nose falls off. He then begins sleeping in an O2 tent, befriends a chimpanzee and creates a small amusement park and zoo at his estate. Somewhere in this timeline he purchases the bones of the Elephant man, the entire Beatles catalog and becomes a recluse.

He then starts to befriend young boys, starting with actors like the Home Alone kid, Corey Feldman and Emmanuel Lewis. He lavishes gifts on these young boys and has them sleep over at his house. No one thinks this is strange.

The sleepovers turned out to be interesting, as the small boys shared a bed with this adult. Once a little boy began to reach puberty, our protagonist gives them the heave-ho and replaces them with younger small boys to share his bed. Again, no one thinks anything of all this. I guess to most people, this all seems fucking normal........

Some folks start to come out of the woodwork once the smell of a payoff is in the air. Hints about inappropriate behavior between the adult and the little boys begin to surface along with some pretty wacky tales of weirdness, and eventually kidnapping. Or hostage taking. Whatever.

Meanwhile, most of America and the world continue to idolize our protagonist. He is simply beyond reproach. Why? Because most people are complete and total morons. He’s a star, he’s rich, he dances like a wee fairy…ad nauseum. Even after said man marries a series of beards and dangles a baby from a hotel window, the crowds continue to cheer.

Eventually a trial is held. Since good lawyers make a lot of money with private firms, the lousy ones who can’t get a job have to work for the state. A couple of these folks began the prosecution of our protagonist......

We couldn’t really expect the Home Alone kid to admit he was involved in some wacky mutual masturbation scene with a freak—it’s just too embarrassing. No celebrity would come out on that one. The victim’s family had zero credibility, evidence was disallowed and fans of the freak were camped out at the courthouse. Our hero kept making trips to the emergency room and couldn’t seem to make it to court every day.....

I have no doubt that the State’s case was a poor one. I have no doubts that the victim’s family was just not that credible. I have no doubts that the jury was drawn from a pool of halfwits. But I find it hard to believe that anyone thinks this guy is innocent. And when the verdict was announced hundreds cheered in the streets. And those people vote. They shop in grocery stores. They drive cars, right along side you and I. Those people work in your building and live next door.

There truly is no hope.

***********

I am no fan of him. Don't ask me why.

 


Jacko: Booo!

Me: Arghhhh!!!!!!!!!

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