Background Info to the New Paper's Male-Female Undergrad Saga (2 Articles)

FIRST ARTICLE:

More than 70% of Sg female undergrads think Sg boys are losers.

http://newpaper.asia1.com.sg/news/0,6310,,00.html?

Grow up guys

More than 70% of women undergrads polled say male undergrads are
immature and whine a lot

The New Paper
21 May 2005

By Medha Lim And Liang Kaixin

HE whines, moans, won't pick up after himself and even brags that
mummy and daddy are paying the bills.

Such is the typical male undergraduate. Or so think his female
counterparts, anyway.

More than 70 of 100 female undergraduates recently polled by The New
Paper say that the men on campus are immature.

Of the remaining number, half felt that the men were mature and the
other half had no opinion.

Apart from a few Singapore Management University students, the women
surveyed were split equally between the National University of
Singapore and the Nanyang Technological University. They ranged from
first-year students to new graduates.

Most seem to be in agreement with Mr Philip Yeo, chairman of the
Agency for Science, Technology and Research (A*Star).

In a recent interview with The New Paper, he described some Singapore
male undergraduates as whiny. Mr Yeo also said that, despite having
undergone National Service, Singapore 'boys' were just not mature
enough.

Some seem to think, rather, that they have 'paid their dues' during NS
and could now slacken when it comes to project work on campus.

But how do these ex-soldier boys hold up, if they have disagreements
with female undergraduates?

Third-year engineering student Tan Xue Fen, 20, said: 'I know of this
guy who cried during committee meetings when there were
disagreements.'

Female students had expected the 23-year-old to be tougher.

There are, roughly, equal numbers of men and women at NTU, NUS and
SMU, according to the 2003 intake of the three universities.

But the women complain that they end up with a much larger workload.

Male undergraduates, they say, think nothing of getting their
girlfriends to pick up after them.

New business graduate Yeo Xiaoxuan, 21, said friends of hers would
rush over to their boyfriends' dormitory rooms to help with domestic
chores.

And many female undergraduates interviewed know of men whose parents
drive over to clean up their dormitory rooms.

Oh, and what if there's a load of dirty washing?

The men just lug it home - unless, of course, they have girlfriends.

Miss Tan, the engineering student, said her friends have had to wash
their boyfriends' clothes. Even their grimy underwear.

And it doesn't get any better in class, say the women.

The men nudge their female classmates and ask to be fed answers - just
so they don't come across sounding stupid.

Third-year biological science student Calista Tan, 21, said: 'They
don't dare to take risks. They ask the girls to test the waters when
asking professors for advice.'

And don't even bother asking the men for an opinion.

The women say male undergraduates can't even decide on what meal to have.

COMPLAIN, COMPLAIN, COMPLAIN

But the men do excel at one thing, their female counterparts insist.

Whining.

Said Miss Neo Xiao Bin, 22, a third-year communications studies
student: 'Most of the guys become full of complaints after NS and they
delight in comparing their experiences during that time.

'If we have a war and these guys are the ones to protect us, it'd be
quite scary to hear all that complaining.'

Some women had been surprised by the level - or volume, perhaps - of whining.

They had thought that going through NS would have resulted in a more
mature outlook.

Indeed the men are so immature that many female students choose to
look elsewhere for dates.

Miss Lum Chen Jie, 22, a fourth-year communications studies student,
said: 'Undergraduate guys have the mentality that the cheesiest
pick-up lines work.

'And their idea of socialising is gathering around telling dirty jokes
that they learnt during NS.'

Even if relationships form, the male undergraduates get a very low rating.

And breaking up is hard for them, if the women are to be believed.

Miss Angeline Tang, 20, an third-year accountancy student, said:
'There are guys who will 'die' without their girlfriends when they
quarrel or break up.'

It affects their work, and often the men will demand sympathy from
their project mates.

Still, Miss Jaclynn Seah, 21, said the women were also to blame.

Said the third-year communications studies student: 'Some friends of
mine clean their boyfriends' rooms and do laundry for them without
being asked.'

Against this, however, is one last factor. Many of the women said that
they expected more from men who were, after all, older than they:
Typically, a first-year male undergraduate is - at 21 - two years
older than his female classmates.

Older, but certainly not more mature. Never mind wiser.

Quipped Miss Huang Xiaojing, a 22-year-old recent arts graduate: '(It
is) probably because they hang out with younger girls.

'That's why they have to accommodate the girls' maturity level.'

THE OTHER GUYS

THIS is how 22-year-old Sheena Chan, a fourth-year communications
studies student at NTU, classifies the male undergraduates she has
met:

The rebel with many causes

- He has something against everything.
- If someone in authority comes up with something, there will be
something wrong with it.
- So only his way is right.
- He likes to criticise.
- But don't expect him to do much else.
- The it's-everyone's-fault-but-mine guy
- This fellow doesn't seem interested in bettering himself.
- Instead, all shortcomings are blamed on someone else.
- During project work, such a person may make a show of thinking.
- But not his share of the doing.
- He will be the first to claim credit, but the last to admit his faults.

The bookworm

- This man just wants to continue studying because he's too scared to
go out and look for a job.
- He ends up with a doctorate but has no real-world experience.
- He may pride himself in getting distinctions or As in his grade transcript.
- Yet he will blandly tell others that 'I don't study a lot'.
- And keeps asking lecturers for 'exam tips'.

The group guy

- Such a man is caught up in a herd mentality.
- Big groups of such 'group guys' like to sit together and ogle girls
and make lewd remarks.
- But, if alone with a woman, that attitude is likely to dissolve.

The slacker

- Thinking that he is very smart, he sits back and relaxes during tutorials.
- He doesn't see any point in doing his tutorial homework properly.
- After all, he can always get the answers from friends.
- He is dependent on others and completely unable to operate independently.

SECOND ARTICLE:

Yesterday, women undergrads called the men whiners. Today, the men
call the women demanding
Little princesses
By Niroshi Sadanandan and Michelle Lee
May 22, 2005

THE men are hitting back.
Male university undergrads - labelled as whiners by their female
counterparts - have lashed out, declaring the girls as demanding and
manipulative.

These young women, the men add, also know how to squeeze out tears
when necessary.

This campus rumpus follows The New Paper report yesterday which said
that more than 70 per cent of women undergrads polled regarded the men
as immature and whiny.

Now, about 70 per cent of the 100 men polled say they see campus women
as little princesses who make unrealistic demands. But the rest said
the girls are not so bad and are reasonable.

Mr Melvin Lee, 23, from NTU, said: 'Most girls want their boyfriends
to sacrifice everything for them - their time with friends, their
weekends.

'They want to go shopping together, do projects together and even
study in pairs.

'Everything must be about her.'

Mr Cheong Li Wei, 24, an NTU communications student, said: 'Some girls
expect guys to treat them like princesses.'

Everything from opening doors to giving free rides, meals and
expensive presents, he added.

Mr Daniel Gan, 23, an NTU engineering student, said: 'They expect guys
to drop them back home each time we have group outings.'

These girls take free rides for granted, not offering to compensate
for petrol or buy drinks to thank them, he said.

Even worse are those who call him days before outings to arrange transport.

Mr Jan Han, 23, an NTU communications studies student, said a male
friend became both Santa Claus and maid to his female classmate
because she was unhappy that he couldn't attend her birthday party.

'To placate her, he took her for a candlelight dinner, bought her a
$200 ring and helped clean her home.'

Some guys blame the influence of romantic movies which lead some women
to expect to be swept off their feet by chivalrous men.

Mr Gan said: 'When my friend's girlfriend went overseas for an
exchange programme, she forced him to buy a web-camera so they could
see each other over the Internet.

'Whenever he didn't respond to her calls and phone messages quickly,
she would cry and threaten a break-up.'

Women expect men to carry their books and bags. They demand chivalry
while screaming for equal treatment, said a number of male undergrads.

According to Mr Marcus Lee, 23, from SIM, most men would would do
simple things like open doors and hold the umbrellas. 'But even if we
don't, girls shouldn't complain,' he said.

Mr Cheong had this advice for the women: 'Even if you are a damsel in
distress, don't whine about your knight not coming to help you.
Chivalry should be bestowed, not extorted.'

The men also complained that women indulge in emotional blackmail and
throw tantrums.

Mr Melvin Lek, a 25-year old student from NIE, said: 'My girlfriend
wants me to be early or at least punctual, but it's all right if she
is late. If I'm late, I'm at the mercy of her moods.'

Mr Tam Ging Wien, 23, a computing NUS student, said: 'The most
frustrating thing - they don't speak their minds.

'I've had girlfriends who'd just give looks that showed they were
angry but refused to explain why. That's immature.'

And women are indecisive, complained the men. Said Mr Marc Daniel
Nair, 23, an NUS Arts student: 'Many girls want to have their cake and
eat it too.'

Don't do - and the men are not chivalrous. Do - and the women become
suspicious, said Mr Aloysius Lim, 22, an NUS Arts undergraduate.

Although most men said women were demanding, only 50 per cent felt
that those demands were unreasonable.

Mr Han said many men are actually 'quite willing to be used',
especially if they like the girl. He said: 'It's fine to have
expectations in a relationship. Just fulfil it - if she's happy,
you're happy.'

Mr Andrew Zhang, 24, an engineering student from NTU, said: 'I think
that as long as it's not too much, expecting guys to give in and be
romantic is okay.

'After all, it makes girls more gracious and accepting, and helps guys
to behave more like guys should.'

NS will toughen princesses

WOMEN should go through military training.

This, said some male university undergraduates, would help make the
women less demanding.

About 78 per cent of the men polled said their national service stint
had made a world of difference to them.

Said Mr Samuel He, 21, of NTU: 'NS gives you a broader perspective on
life - you experience so much more and meet a wide variety of people.'

Many men said NS made them tougher, both mentally and physically.

Mr Jared Foo, 23, from NTU, said: 'I knew a girl whose maid would go
to the hostel to clean her room.

'No guy who's been through NS would ever call his mother and complain
about anything.'

What about the women's complaint that men are indecisive?

Mr Li Siwei, a 21-year-old NUS student, said: 'When deciding where to
eat, they'll say, 'I don't know' and 'It's up to you'. But when the
guys decide, they still complain.'

Mr Jan Han, 23, from NTU, said: 'They are pro-feminism and yet they
want chivalry. It's totally contradictory and you never know how they
want you to behave.'

DARREN SAYS:

I just read a forum where 2 guys are quarreling with 1 girl. Very
entertaining, but also a bit worrying. Govt will be very worried.
Looks like the plan to encourage more babies is bleak. I feel that, if
so troublesome, if both sides not happy, then it's not worth the
trouble already.. why go through so much pain for an illusory gain?